Of friends and ghosts...down memory lane

There are only two people here at our side of the building...me and PM (Papa Mon, my boss). We'er doing our report for tomorrow's TPPA class, and since I won't be able to attend classes on the 12th, I'm going all out in the preparations...to the point that I'm missing dance practice with the choir.

I miss the choir (P&W). But lately, I'm having second thoughts about pursuing it. For one, I have classes on Saturdays and it's a struggle to be on time for formal lessons with Bro. Rannie. Second, even if I arrive late, I have to catch up and by that time, I'm mighty tired already. Third, I think the dance ministry needs me more. Iyos, too, is trying to balance work, dance and studies, and I want to fulfill my end if just to lighten her burden a bit. I'm beginning to enjoy dancing again, even if at the end of the day, we worry so much about our clothes, making mistakes, my big thighs (hahaha!), our hair. Sometimes, I marvel at how long my thread of patience has become. Now, I am able to wait on tardy people. Can give them a smile, even. I can truly appreciate how hard the new comers are working to catch up. I admire the "banner boys" who are always there, even if they are too tired. I've tried the banners and man! I have to rest my wrists, wrap them up in chili plasters, for two days! I appreciate Mommy Auxie and Uncle Randy...

Fourth...(yes, there's a long list) it's going to be mighty lonely for me at practices, with Giselle flying to the States soon and Paul getting the "out" sign. Giselle is one of my closests friends, in and out of the choir, while Paul is my closest male friend in the community. The reason I bear the long practices well is because I can make chikka with them, and after a while, go have some gimiks. Paul, especially, who never gets pikon even when I call him "B".

I miss my true, old friends. The ones I thought were my friends proved to be...never mind. I've always believed in the golden rule...do unto others blah blah. But I think some believe in just taking...I'm tired of waiting for them, and making excuses for their indifference.

Now, I appreciate my old grade/highschool buddies, my SGS friends, my TEC co-moderators, my chingu Louis. There might be times I'm too busy to be with them, but they always show appreciation for each other's presence. I might be eccentric, loud, weird, funny, mataray, domineering, arrogant, bitchy and impossible to get along with, but they've accepted me the way I am. Thanks, guys, for being such wonderful people.

I'm thinking of going back and visiting old friends...I hope I can contact my CDB/RCBC friends again..(Mama Tess! Erssy cola! Alex! Che and Jamie) my MRT tropa (best friend Jopet, bestfriend Jen, Miriam at kahit na si Dingdong na ...)Mga dating YM ng SGS...Saan na kayong lahat???My college barkada (Liza, George, Aleli, Josette, Eileen, Jen, Jeni...) and ActSci co-geniuses (?? Myra, Mia, Emelyn, She, Erna, Hans and - Rene - kahit sinabihan mo ko na walang people skills)

Now I regret not having enough time for them; regret being too self-preoccupied and snappy. Regret that I didn't want to be makulet, wanting to have so much space to move around. I miss my true friends.

If I sound so dramatic, sorry po. Tao lang. Na-miss ko mag-emote sa CR bago maligo dahil last night, may spiritistang nag punta sa bahay. Though I've always known na may spirits sa bahay, having it confirmed is scary. Kasi dati, feeling ko, baliw lang ako. Pero sabihin bang may third eye ako!? Yikes. At sa lahat naman ng lugar kung saan merong nakalibing na bata, sa may malapit pa sa kwarto ko...sa may bintana ko pa! Kaya pala yung maid, may katabing asin at bigas sa pagtulog...kulang na lang, magsabit ng bawang sa katawan. Fortunately, di naman sila interested magpakita...kaya kanina, instead of acting-acting pa sa harap ng salamin sa CR, diretso ligo na ako. Baka may maki-sabat sa dialogues ko eh.