Update

Everything's coming into place...but why do I feel like it's all moving too fast, too soon?But if we go any slower, we'd be on a stand still.

Okay. So in fairness, he's around...at least for now. He'll be assigned in Subic for the next four months..or more. Hahaha. We're still confused. Nothing's changed about that. We're still using "ewan", "bahala na", "di ko alam" more than ever. And some people are now on the know...like my parents and his "foster parents".

The boat is sinking

Arggg! I am near suffering a serious emotional breakdown, just having to think about whatever's happening to him.

First off, he's on his way to his home province, after visiting a relative somewhere in Mindanao. It ticked me off, that he could so easily put me on hold. Then today, he asks me to call him, it's an emergency. His ferry stopped in the middle of nowhere enroute to sonewhere far away...What am I suppose to do? What did he expect me to do?

I'm beginning to wonder about all of this...is he playing me for a fool? Playing on my weakness? He knows I can't turn my back on anybody...

Hay. I'm tired. I want to go to bed and wake up and not remember this day.

Live…at Channel 4

July 3. It’s my first time to join the BS Singers for the anniversary ceremony since, usually, the EISG people would be at the lobby busily scrambling about and around the MPSS kiosk. In fairness, everything went smoothly and I had no major contribution save for a PowerPoint presentation assigned to me.

July 4. Live on Channel 4. Sang the Pambansang Awit and an intermission number “Umiikot, Sumisirko” (by Ryan Cayabyan, under the tutelage of our musical director, Dr. Raul Navarro). First time. And of course, I just have to inform my parents and several friends about it. My mom was able to see it. XBF? Am not sure if he even received my message. Not even a word about it from him.

July 7. Eone’s first birthday party at Bounz. I had grand visions of bringing the “One” to the event, if he’ll ever ever make it. But of course, as Fate would have it, he did not make it. And I am tired of getting excited about his homecoming. Now, it seems I don’t even want to bother anymore. I don’t want to think about it. I don’t want to prepare myself. What for? He might not even want to see me and talk to me anymore. I have erased all expectations, right?

Seriously, tomorrow is the “day of reckoning”. Judgment day. Make or Break. And for now, it’s really a break. Thinking of all the opportunities that I gave him that he let pass…I can’t imagine going through more of those. I just want him to be attentive…never mind if he can’t be always present. I’ve decided that I do deserve someone better, and maybe, if he wants it as badly as I do, he’d see that, too.

Meebo...Friends of Friendster

It’s been a while since my last blog update. In between work, my crazy lovelife and meebo chatting, I’ve little time for anything else. Hahahaha.

What’s with work: The anniversary is on Tuesday, so as usual, the whole group is busy with PowerPoints, brochures, scale models, kiosks, drilling and measuring. I wish I could help out with the physical aspect, but Kuya won’t let anyone within a foot of his precious handwork. Haha. He’s really good at it, actually. I’ll post the pictures later.

Lovelife. The question is always “Are we in our out?”. The funny thing is, while I’ve been on a roller coaster of emotions here, he’s been constantly just … okay. If you ask him, we never had problems. We never had a cool off, a break-up and such. Lately, he’s been back on track, communicative and accessible. I really wonder how a man’s mind works.

Meebo Chatting? What’s meebo. Eversince YM was banned from the office, and I’ve learned of meebo (thanks to Leah of TEC), I’ve been hooked. Once, to keep myself from texting H*m, I decided to check out what the new chatrooms are all about. I got curious with the My Boyfriend is a Jerk room, actually. Met a few people inside and went back for more. Then I decided to check Friends of Friendster, and hola! The chatter in me was born.

Overtime, I got to know a lot of people, and two weeks into chatting, we had an EB! I met with Alcubes, Kuyapopoy, Chie, Peppermint, Nelspawn and Azerah at Glorietta. I was anxious, even with my previous F4 EB experience since these people are strangers, and they are not F4 fans. Hahaha.

Anyway, here are the pics...

That's KuyaPopoy, Alcubes and Nelspawn

Me and Alcubes

...Azerah(?), Peppermint, Jing (?), Me, Alcubes and Nelspawn

Another group picture.. I can't remember the name of the other girl, since she is not a meebo chatter. Lol