no matter how much we love and care for a person, if we are uncertain of our position, there will be a point when the only thing certain is to give up...(Anonymous)

I wanted a sweet, thoughtful guy. Someone who'd bombard my message inbox with senseless ILUs and sweet nothings. Yes, I am a hopeless, story-book romantic. My eyes do get heart-shaped instead of round. And I do feel the flutter in my stomach when I think of my guy.

But I didn't get my wish. No siree. Not an ounce of sweetness. Long-distance relationships have only the cellphone as salvation. But not a peep from him for one and a half day until his problems mounted up and he needed to talk to me. I got sick but wanted to stay up so we could finally talk, and all he had to say was "i'm going to sleep". Hell. I almost deleted his name from my contact list.

On the other hand, the guys I've turned down continued to bombared me with ILUs, even if I had told them I am already semi-committed.

So now, yes, I'm having second thoughts. And third and fourth and a hundred petty reasons why I should just up and leave him. But I'm holding my ground, stupid me. I'm waiting for a sign, like I did before...perhaps then, I'd see some glimmer of hope.